We often hear that happiness stems from meaning or purpose. It’s a term that took root in the United States and has since crossed the Atlantic to stay. The problem with these words is that they raise big questions. To begin with, are we talking about meaning in its broad sense, or something more personal? If it’s the latter, what does giving our lives meaning actually mean? And, in any case, how do we locate that purpose? Is it innate, or do we manufacture it?
The uncertainties are many, and not a few thinkers and psychologists have tried to shape answers. One of those who has perhaps invested more effort than most in tackling this grand problem is contemporary philosopher Susan Wolf. For her, it is not enough to feel fulfilled; what matters is what makes us feel fulfilled. And this has far more implications than we might imagine.
The meaning of life
Philosophy and religion have wrestled with the same question for millennia: what is the meaning of life? Religions find their answer in the image of God, existentialists tell us that life, at its core, has no inherent meaning, even though humans are predisposed to seek it. In any case, Susan Wolf is not concerned with meaning as the grand question of the universe.
What Wolf wants to discover, ultimately, is what constitutes meaning within individual lives: what leads a person to say “my life has no meaning” or “I feel I am doing something meaningful.” How do we humans give meaning to our lives?
The traditional answer provided by psychology is that we assign meaning to our lives on the basis of “self-interest” or “morality.” That is, we do things because they bring us personal benefit, or because we think it is the morally right option.
However, there are grey areas in which neither motivation applies. For instance, when we go to visit a friend in hospital we may not be thinking of our own self-interest (it can make the day far more difficult), nor is it necessarily the greatest moral good on offer. And yet, it can be a profoundly meaningful act. For Wolf, the motivation behind this act, and behind all that is meaningful, is love.
The reasons for love
“The reasons of love have a distinctive and important role in our lives. They should not be equated with reasons of self-interest or morality,” writes Wolf in Meaning in Life and Why it Matters (2010). The sense, therefore, would arise from “loving objects worthy of being loved and relating to them in a positive way.”
Thus we have a definition of meaning. What gives our lives meaning is love. The Spanish philosopher Rafael Narbona also surely agrees with the thinker on this point. In Elogio del amor, he invites us to consider that if there is anything that can endow us with meaning, it is love.
Wolf, however, goes a step further and asks: what is the exact formula by which a person can give meaning to their life?
A life with meaning
According to Susan Wolf there are two paths to cultivating meaning in life: pursuing one’s passion, and committing to a cause larger than oneself. These two aims can make us feel deeply connected to meaning, but alone they do not complete the formula.
That is, if your passion is lounging on the sofa watching Netflix, you are very unlikely to feel that you are giving your life meaning. Conversely, if you choose the goal of eradicating poverty in the world, but achieving it requires taking a dull office job that you hate, you will feel just as empty.
The key, then, is to find the precise point where these two strands converge. To discover something you are passionate about and that allows you to engage with a larger cause. “A life is meaningful to the extent that its subjective attractions are directed toward things or goals that are objectively valuable,” the philosopher writes. “In other words, a life is meaningful to the extent that one is loving things worthy of love and is able to do something positive about it. A life is meaningful to the extent that it is actively and lovingly involved in valuable projects.”
In other words, Wolf would say, meaning comes from active involvement in valuable projects that connect us with the world in a positive way.
Loving meaningful things
We are left with just one final step to complete Wolf’s theory. If the secret of life’s meaning lies in loving things that are worthy of love, who tells us what is and isn’t worthy?
The question is complex, because Susan Wolf herself concedes that this value can change across eras. Thus, in the fifteenth century being a knight might have been a worthy aim of love, recognised by all as valuable to the realm. Yet in the twenty‑first century, no one would claim that becoming a knight is a life goal for most people.
The value of what we do, therefore, is closely tied to the society in which we live. It is a matter of doing anything that is legitimately useful or enriching in some way, that brings people together, or enables them to develop fully, challenge themselves, or realise their potential, that honours a tradition or practice, or that preserves a place or way of life. The definition is broad, but the key is to look beyond personal involvement.
That is, meaning arises when our activity connects with something meaningful that goes beyond merely occupying the self and touches on a reality outside of us—whether other beings, traditions or values. When the value of what we do goes beyond our own passion or love. Wolf’s message, therefore, is fairly straightforward. If you want to give your life meaning, find something to love, ensure its value does not come solely from your own love, and strive to contribute something positive with it. That is all.
